I feel like...

I feel like... Closing down this blog.
Then making a new one.
Will I be happier in there? LOL.
jkjk.
Cos I dun like looking at my archives and seeing the most boring posts of the 21st century.
Okay fine, nothing can get more boring than
"I have nthn to say. So I'll just reply tags. Bye all~ =)"

Gosh. Do you go write in your diary smthn like,
"Dear Diary,
Today is Saturday.
I have nthn to say.
Bye Diary".

Heck, and who keeps a book diary now.
Mine exists in loose paper.
And I barely even understand my thoughts at that time.
Comes with messy, emotional cursive handwriting. Haha x)
But somehow, most of them end up being song lyrics.
Well, no need to be looking back.
I still think my 1st and 2nd posts were awesome.
But it was damn messy. Heck.

I was watching MTV at my aunt's place earlier.
Britney Spears is quite interesting.
From Teen Idol to Flop.
Good job :]
And I actually forgot she qactually came from Disney Channel.
Ugh, Disney. That's where JB came from.
Haha, there's a pretty disgusting joke I heard over their "purity rings".
Won't say it out here. :x

Anyways, if you all are aware, this is a pretty random post.
Cos I'm taking a break.
While my family does up the house for HR celebs.
I'm typing away on this keyboard.
Everytime I touch a keyboard,
I feel arrows first.
Even though I don't play Audi anymore.
I feel the arrows.
Audi. I miss it, yet hate it.
Its made my life helluva lot better,
and helluva alot worse.
Please, it's complicated beyond words,
that's why the two sentences contradict.
Oh yes, another thing Zamma noted of Me.

"ismail, you're happy yet you emo."

That is a contradiction. And I do not emo.
I engage in self-thinking.
Would anyone like to hear my thoughts out loud?
The world will probably tilt further than it is.
Obama says goodbye America's four seasons.
Lee Kwan Yew goes why the hell is Singapore snowing.

Well. Yes more randomness.
And back to the original thing that's bugging me.
I find it harder to smile everyday.
Is it lethargy.
Or self-denial?
And no, you're not meant to answer this question x)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I feel doubled.
I feel sidelined.
I feel wasted.
I feel hypocritical.
And I feel like going to study.
Or playing DS. heh x)
But I just don't want to affect other people.
I got my own problems alright?
Be with me and I'll laugh with you.
Leave me alone and I'll do my own stuff.
For this stuff is mine to handle,
You can say I'm too arrogant for your help.
But how in the blue world do I ask for help.
When I don't even know my problem.

Who I've Been Hates Who I Am.
Do I try to put rationale behind everything.
Nopes. I think I just wonder why too much.

It's all bad timing.

AND IM NOT EMO :]
Emo is a casually used term
quite often used in the wrong situations.
Maybe tired is more appropriate.

Smail Always,
Even if I dont

Music x)

Oh, LOL.
I decided to add music to accompany the previous post.
The end of the previous post rather...
Cos It seems that my blog is musicless now xD


the song that was once here was Big Bang - Baby Baby.
Dedicated ;D

http://bigbangkorean.wordpress.com/2008/05/27/baby-baby-lyrics/

I'm forever titleless lah.

Okay, the previous post was clearly my half-awake jabs of ridiculousity (if there is such a word) and frustrations.
I dunno, I feel messed up lately.
I think I was more focused with my pants torn like a rag.
Now I really look deceiving.

Mdm Ho - Ismail arr.. everytime so dreamy one. deceiving boy, then can do his tests. You dunno if he listening you know! He like so bo chap...
Ismail - Cher I WHERE GOT BO CHAP?
Mdm Ho - You Chap meh?
Ismail - Good point.

Well, I still feel messed up.
Right before exams. That's just awesome man.
Ismail you rock.
I sometimes feel like putting on those headphones again.
And just listening to music again.
Oh the peace, oh the joy.
But doing that takes away hours of my time.
*Yes, I can get that much if you're still not aware*
But I'm addicted. I get the itch to listen like at every oppurtunity.
But well, I'm trying to study without it.
So yeah. According to the wise one,
"You must try studying without music,
cos when you do the test. Music isn't there,
the external stimulus to your brain isn't there."
External stimulus to my brain. Awesome.

Anyways, I think I shall continue my half-hour planned break from studying.

What I did today. Uhh, I'm not in the mood to create a new topic. xD

1hr - MT.
1hr - Chem. *I made awesome progress in the easy chapter of Bonding. =P*
1hr - Assembly *I watched a guy tap his fingers and feet professionally*
1/2hr - Recess. *Joked, Music-ed. Chem-ed*
2hrs - Maths. *Yeah baby yeah. Maths. I've come to realise there's loads of A maths forgotten*
1/2hr - Eng *Crossword puzzle. Exciting*
Went home.

On my way home I met two interesting characters.
Nashrah -
Okay I was rushing home. No time to really talk. I said bye, it's a miracle she didn't take that as an insult.
Btw, she's a girl obsessed with the Jonas.
The Jonas, ladies and gentleman.
The Jonas. ._.
But they're targeted at a specific age group.
Teens. I classify there, but strangely I'm not into them.
I find I'm unlike those that go...

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH
MMMMMMMMMMYYYYYYYYYYYY
GGGGGGGGGOOOOOOOOOSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHH.
IIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTTTTTSSSSSSSSSSS
TTTTTTTTTTHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
JOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSS.
OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
*drools*

Woah woah woah.
I'm sure I'm not the only one not reacting like that.
And people who love Jonas are highly defensive.
E.g. Nashrah is threatening to pull my arm off one day,
if I continue stating my opinions on the Jonas.
BUT NOW. I got somthing good to say about them.
Unfortunately, I forgot ><"
Then I took the MRT.
Then i checked the clock. I was still pretty early.
On my way down I saw another character.

Sindy Tan.
Awesome. Yeah, if some of you tell me this name sounds familiar.
I won't blame you. She lost my phone.
Heh. I think I'm still mad with her.
But, I never really show do I.
I called her and said, "I see a faggot on the escalator". (it's a joke btw)
Wow, what a greeting eh.
So yeah, we normally start conversations with a basic insult.
Different People, different ways I guess xD
Although I dun mean a single thing I say.

*Note to Zamma. See, sensitivity is needless when ppl joke ._.

*Note to Nash if she's reading.
I am not forgiving and forgetting.
I dun think I even forgave her yet. So F&F still applies xD
Well, I still joked with her.

What, lose my phone and spew a paragraph of vulgarities everytime I see her? I know I'm not in the wrong. But heck,
Maybe I just get too nice to everyone.
Well, almost. Everyone.

(btw, she offered to buy me a phone. IMO, dun tell me. I doubt you have the cash in e first place. buy then say. lol xD)
So i just told her she no money can buy wad thing. Heh.

Then we talked about a common friend we "had".
Note word "had".
I don't know
what has become of her.
Like I need to really care much.
The way she treats me, the things she "expected of me"
*oh, the cheek of it*
Well, guess there's some people you can live life without.
Or maybe it's better if you never knew them in the first place =x
Mrs S. Ho applies here too.
Then I walked home with Danial.
Sorry to keep you waiting man =x

Yes. That was my day.
And I shall go continue A maths. Cya.
and yes. I dunno why my posts now are so monotonous.
I'm losing this enthusiasm to blog.
I prefer joking around personally.
Or through the phone.
It gets more... expressive xD
No reactions, no nothing.
Try not to expect another post so soon =P
Smail x)

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I dunno where you've gone.
I dunno what happened.
Did I do you wrong?
I dohope its not cos of me.
Just a sign perhaps?
Or a straight reason, that'll be nice x)

What happened to that Lor Mai Kai.
What happened to Coffee.
I'd still drink it with you, sugar-free.
if only you were there.
Maybe I just wasn't good enough ><

Its not sensitivity.
It's just concern.
Haha. Lols. Kawaii lahs.
Heh, still means alot if all you say is one word.
Even if it ends up being goodbye.
I still await every minute.
For that one name.
For that one ring.

Ismail looks at...

Chem. Shit, still got a whole book.
A Maths. Hell no. damn. Everything learnt before last month has been forgotten >< Biology. Crap, extreme text digestion required.
Geography. Now where were those diagrams...
Social Studies. Looks promising, the book is thin.
E Maths. Circles Circles Circles. Never Ends.
Literature. I still haven finished the book. And having rushed lessons through half the book aint helping.
MT. Huh, got mother tongue? x)
English. You can't be serious...

8 delightful subjects. ._.
Half require extreme mugging.
The clock is ticking.
My holidays depends on my marks.
What kind of shitty deal is that.

And My A Maths homework is still yet to be done.
P.S. My CME fail. Wow.

MY ENG ORAL WAS MARVELLOUS.
I sat down, crossed fingers and talked the whole way.
Tester - "Okay, please read aloud."
*Ismail reads aloud*
Tester - "Ermm... Can you read a little softer"
Ismail - "Ohh, Read aloud but not too loud. Sure =D"

Picture Convo was like a home ec room. Except there were several adults cooking.

At one point in time for the picture convo.
Ismail - "And the main character in the picture, the woman with the row of black buttons who i presume to be the main chef. *points at the chef*. Yeah, see that one over there. That one. I think she... "

At another point in time for the Picture Convo.
Ismail - "Well, there are... the old people. and there are... the younger people. From all walks of life, all cooking together."

At another point in time.
Ismail - "I believe this room is a multi-purpose room. *points to the Visualiser in the corner of the room* Look, there's even some technology present to help with the other functions. And lots of tables too.*

Its been ages since I did pic conv. What the hell happened xD

Topic Conversation.
Tester - If you were to take a job in the vacation. What job would you like to take up?
Ismail - Considering my qualifications arr... less the 0 lvls. I think I'll try to be a waiter lahh. You see ar, like, I mean, this job would be able to... bla bla bla.

*continues informal language through half the conv. LOL.
Irony - I still got A1 xD

Reminds me of my Malay oral a little bit too..

Ismail - saya rasa masyarakat ini ada banyak.... apa makna facilities?...
(I believe that society has many... what's facilities in malay?)
Tester - Kesenangan...
Ismail. AH! YES. kesenangan... blah blah blah.

Wow. asking the tester for a translation. Awesome eh xD

Further results.
A Maths test - A1
Chem and SS. Fail.

SS was awesome too.
Qn 1a (7), 1b (8) qn 2. (12)

Did 1b end up do wrong source.
Cancelled whole thing. Redo.
Look at clock, left five minutes.
Looks at question.
"How far does the author show that... bla bla bla"
*Looks at clock again. 3min*
*Answers Qn 2 - Very Far. <--- that's a full stop. *sleeps* 9/25.

You know, the thing about teachers now.
At some point, they elevate their subject above all others.
For in their view, theirs matters.
Esp Maths.
They are oblivious that we take 8 subjects.
With a homework the height of my ankle. (Not in books, seriously in questions ._.)
Things start to seem...
Robotically in motion.

Students of Singapore -
90% Complain.
1% Saying Sian.
1% staring at Chinese scholars in amazement.
1% Sleeping.
1% Slacking.
1% not knowing what teachers rant about.
1% Forgetting everything.
1% Wondering why their life is so.
1% Staring at homework.
1% Realising how close EOYs are.
0.5% Promising themselves to work. Or give up. Either one.
0.4% Telling the guy next to you, Jia you.
0.1% Work.

Don't crap. Athletes coming from the youth of Singapore?
You must be joking. Singapore Sports School? Wow.
Geniuses cum World-Class Athletes.
That's a realistic mix for every Singaporean.
With our education system. That's just well in sight man. Kudos.
A great possibilty. A vision for Singapore.
I doubt sleep was factored. So yeah, take sleep out of the equation,
you have a well balanced formula right there. :]

-Continues A Maths.

P.S. Parents are actually a main pressure factor in most IMO.
*looks at the P6 girl struggling away for PSLE.*
Wow. Talk about an awesome childhood.
The new Uniquely Singapore National Identity
-Students of all colors mugging together.

reply to quizzes.

1. The person who tag/pass you is?
*Karen and karin. I think.

2. Your relationship with him/her?
Friends.

3.Your five impression of him/her?
err.. Dunno leh. ><

4. The most memorable thing he/she had done for you?
err. say hello =)

5.The most memorable thing he/she has said to you?
hello =)

6. If he/she become your lover, you will?
Err... huh.

7. If he/she became your lover, he/she has to improve on?
Err... huh.

8. If he/she became my enemy, you will?
Err... try to wonder why she became my enemy and fix that.

.9. If he/she became your enemy, the reason will be?
No reason at all. That's why alot of ppl dun like me anyway xD

10. The most desired thing you want to do for him/her is?
Huh... err. remain friends?

11. Your overall impression of him/her is?
Dunno leh. Nice people =)

12. How you think people around you will feel about you?
Err... Dunno leh. Mixed lah. One day angry one day happy xD

13. The characters you love of yourself are?
Dunno leh. I just like me.

14. On the contrary, the characters you hate yourself are?
I normally dun fix my problems. Even though I fix other's.

15. The most ideal person you want to be is?
Ssshhh =x

16. For people who care and like you, say something to them.
I love you too.

17. Pass this quiz to first 10 person that you can think of, how they feel about you.
Just select yourself as one of the ten and do =)

---------------------------------End of 1st quiz--------------------------------------------

2nd quiz by Sean Teo.
#1 Where would you go if someone sponsors you an air ticket ?
-Makkah if I feel religious
-Some western country if I wanna go on holiday

#2 What's your favourite thing to do ?
Listening to Music. ;)

#3 Do you think money can buy happiness ?
Materialistic and short term happiness. Yes
True happiness. No.

#4 If you were given a chance to receive something, what would it be ?
Love and Happiness. :D

#5 Things you cant live without :
My heart.
Friends.
Music Player.
Phone
Myself.


#6 What are you afraid to lose ?
Family & Friends.

#7 If you win $1 million dollars, what would you do ?
-Give some to my family.
-Buy a house
-Invest.
-Spend.

#8 What do you dream of doing in the future ?
Being a millionaire is cool .
But I wanna have a comfortable job that helps people.

#9 List down 3 good points about the person who gave you this survey :
-Dam friendly.
-Trustworthy
-Fun person.

#10 What makes you happy ?
-Music.
-Joking around.
-Making my dad proud. (It like, rarely happens anyway)

#11 What type of person do you hate the most ?
Liars.
Backstabbers.

#12 If you have a super power what would it be ?
To remove all vices from the world.

#13 Would you go for happiness or money ?
Happiness

#14 Who do you think is the most important people in your life ?
Family
Friends
N

#15 If you have a girlfriend, would you die for her ?
depends on the situation

#16 Who's the last person who hugged you ?
Can't rmb. I think I hugged a boy last time I hugged.

#17 What is the one thing you want to do badly right now ?
Listen to Music.
make an MMV.

#18 Who are you close to ?
err.. those that are close to me?

#19 Are you courageous enough to the person that you like her ?
Hehe, If she does. =P

#20 If you could do one thing all over again what would it be ?
Try to make less mistakes or lousy judgments.

7 things that scare you:
My dad.
Losing people around me.
getting lousy results.
Reaching a dead end.
Losing my stuff.
Losing a part of me
Getting bitten by something huge.

7 random facts about me :
- Can't play musical instruments but love music.
- Been transferring from place to place all my life.
- Prefer to entertain rather than impress.
- I realised im quite secretive.
- I don't like to follow people's traditional ideas of leadership. If you get people to follow, you're a leader.
-Sometimes I feel I mislead people.
-Like to help people out for proper reasons.
- My first Aid ain't that great.

7 things i plan to do before i die :
-To make sure I feel fulfilled.
-Do loads of good deeds.
-Leave enough money for my family.
-Try to remembered for one reason or another.
-If I have children, to have raised them well.
-Atone for my sins.
-Live life as I would like it.

7 things i can do:
-Eat
-Sleep
-Read
-Slack
-Cycle
-Play
-Study

7 things you are attracted to in the opposite sex :
People are so diverse. Making a checklist is meaningless xD

-----------------------------end-----------------------------------------------------------

Okay, quizzes are done. :]

P.S. The dedications need loads of time. Its still under drafts.

Smail is happier now, but stressed by exams! =O